My husband Jason and I have always been interested in literature on how your thoughts can improve your life. We came across the movie The Secret several years ago and learned about a powerful universal law, the law of attraction. My sister had heard Oprah interviewing a Canadian author and law of attraction “how-to guy” Michael Losier on her Oprah and Friends radio show. She learned some very simple tools that sparked my interest so I decided to take his course and become a Certified Law of Attraction facilitator in Vancouver almost 5 years ago. The simplicity of the information he presented and its application in my life have allowed me to lead a more extraordinary life. Implementing these simple techniques can allow you and your family to experience more joy in your life as well.
Here’s how it works, the thoughts you think and how you feel give off a certain energy or vibration (not unlike the waves of energy required for your cell phone to transmit a signal). The law of attraction is always trying to match the energy you are putting out. Like attracts like. For instance, if you feel good most of the time and have positive thoughts, chances are you are getting experiences in your life that match that vibration. The opposite is also true for people who just seem to have a black cloud around them, the worse it gets, the worse it gets.
As a mom of 3 young boys, there are certain self-care routines I have that keep me at a higher vibration. I like to take the time to exercise regularly, eat well, have fun with my clients at work, and the list goes on. When my life gets out of balance and I don’t make room for these things, my vibration lowers. When this happens, I am no longer the ‘tone setter’ I want to be in my house. If my kids wake up in a bad mood or start fighting, I go down to the vibration they’re at and my days can get very long. These are the days when my husband can not get home soon enough. On the other hand, when I am ‘selfish’ and do the things in my self-care routine that keep me at a higher vibration, I can bring the kids up to my level. The tone in the house then changes and Jason can tell what kind of day we had by the energy he feels when he walks through the front door. As a parent, it is imperative for me to keep myself engaged in the things that keep me at the highest vibration possible so I can create the tone I want in my family. What are some self-care routines that help you stay at a higher vibration? Are you doing enough of these things on a consistent basis? You can tell you are by how you feel.
Since the universe is always ‘checking in’ on the vibrations you are sending out, there are words you can choose that can literally change the way you think and when you change the way you think and feel, your energy shifts. Micheal Losier taught us this easy technique:
Most of us use the words ‘don’t, not and no’ over 100 times before lunch.
The challenge with these words from an energetic perspective is that most of us especially children, dogs, google, and the universe have difficulty with these words. Tell someone “don’t think of a pink elephant” and what do they think about? A pink elephant. Tell your dog “we’re not going for a walk” and the dog starts to wag its tail because he thinks he’s going for a walk. Type in ‘no football’ in google and you’ll likely get everything football.
So, from an energetic perspective it then becomes important to change our language and ask ourselves the question “what do I want?”. If I don’t want my kids to hit each other or fight, I say “be gentle”. If I don’t want my family to get sick I simply say “we want to be healthy and strong”. Don’t the words “I want to be healthy and strong” have a completely different vibration than “I don’t want to be sick”?.
The implementation of this technique sounds simple but when I started a few years back, it took about a month to change my language around things. I found it especially challenging at the time with a young child when I would say things like “don’t throw your food off your tray!”. I had to start asking myself “what do I want?” and the answer was simple but got a completely different result from him. I started telling him what I wanted like “please keep your food on your tray”. Once you start using it you will notice how some coaches, teachers and other parents are constantly telling their kids what they don’t want them to do. A friend of mine’s volleyball coach at university would tell them during a time-out “whatever you do when when you get back in the game, don’t miss your serve!”. She said that was the year it seemed they missed the most serves. One of our patients came in the other day after having fallen in her driveway. She had just been in the week before to have us help her recover from falling in her driveway. I knew she must have a lot of fear around her driveway so I asked her “what were you thinking about right before you fell?”, she replied, “don’t fall!”. That is precisely what happened to her. We started to work on better language for her to use in that situation focusing more on the desired outcome and we quickly came up with “stay balanced and strong!”. She thought those words felt completely different and has started using them every time she’s on her slippery driveway.
I recently taught this technique to my boys who are 6 and 4 years old. They understood the concept right away and have been putting it into practice ever since (their programming is less deep than mine, so they got it quicker). What a great habit for our kids to learn to better communicate what they want vs what they don’t want. They do a great job of holding me accountable for my language and point out to me when I slip up and misuse the words don’t, not and no.
I hope this is as helpful to you as it has been for my family and I. When we change the way we think and talk, it sends out a different energy/vibration to the universe. As a result, we get a different and often more desirable outcome. Michael Losier says it best “You don’t always get what you want, but you always get what you vibrate”.